My subscription to Life expired, but I still have a subscription to Mad.

Monday, July 17, 2006

adventures in colonoscopy

I had my first colonoscopy four years ago and the doctor discovered and removed a couple of small polyps during the procedure. Ever since, I have often thought about my second colonoscopy worrying what the doctor might find this time in my older body. (My father and grandmother had colon cancer.)

Last month, my mother had an edoscopy from the same doctor who had performed my first colonoscopy and I accompanied her to get the results. So, while I was there, I made an appointment for my second colonoscopy, which was scheduled for Friday, the 14th.

The procedure is a piece of cake, but the preparation the day before is awful. I won't go into details, but I assure you, it is the most painful experience I have ever had without being sick or hurt. (Here is the poop on the prep, if you are interested).

My test was at 8:30 AM and they wheeled me into the testing area right on schedule, I was out cold a minute or two later. The last thing I remember was telling the anesthesiologist about EME communications (in response to his question, "How far can you talk with ham radio?") Next thing I remember was waking up in the recovery room looking at the clock, which read 9:05 AM.

I had no recollection of anything while I was under. I did not recall any dreams, nor did I recall that I had any dreams that I could not remember. As far as I can tell, I did not exist consciously or subconsciously. There was just nothing going on. I guess that is how it feels to be dead.

By the way, the results of the test were good; everything was normal and no polyps were found.

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